I don’t know what exactly I was thinking when I suggested that moving house right when we were having a baby was a good idea. To be fair, I didn’t exactly present it as a “good” idea…more of a “not as terrible as it sounds at first” idea. I will say right up front that if you are considering it yourself, do not do it. Seriously - it is a TERRIBLE idea.
When I say “right when we are having a baby” I am not exaggerating at all: the baby was born on Friday, the movers came on Sunday (to pack) and Monday (to move everything) and I left the hospital on Tuesday…to come home to a new house still in day-after-move-in disarray. It all worked out (or is working out) in the end, as things tend to do, but it was really, incredible, unbelievably bad at times. And that was with a not insignificant amount of help (including the fact that we did almost none of the packing ourselves and paid the movers to do it for us).
The good points:
- We don’t live in our old, much-too-small house anymore, which was obviously the goal.
- The new house has a kitchen that’s big enough for two (or more) to cook in and a bathroom that does not require acrobatic skills to share in the morning.
- We really love our new neighborhood. For one thing, it’s an actual neighborhood! Where people talk to each other and everything. Amazing.
- Eventually the stress of the move will all blend in with the new-baby stress, and we’ll hardly remember the difference. (Wishful thinking, maybe?)
- Recovering from major abdominal surgery and taking care of a newborn are really good excuses for not unpacking too quickly.
The bad points:
- Bringing a new baby home to a new, largely unfamiliar house that’s still almost entirely filled with boxes is not all that conducive to any kind of restful recovery period. This will result in a lot of crying on the part of the hormonal new mother.
- The person not actually giving birth is stuck overseeing the moving process and misses out on way too much of the boring sitting-around-the-hospital time that is actually really nice bonding time.
- The person whose bright idea it was to move will probably feel very guilty about how much work the other person is doing and also how much boring bonding they are missing and will become extremely emotional about it all, probably involving a good bit of crying (again). (Okay, maybe that’s just me.)
- Not unpacking quickly means that you will be living in a disaster area for a long time. You will spend large amounts of time balancing a baby in one arm while tossing boxes at random looking for things.
So, to recap: DO NOT move at the same time you are having a baby. (Or your partner is having a baby, or anyone in your household is having a baby.) Figure out some other solution on some other timeline. Trust me - any other plan at all will be easier. If you really, really have no choice in the matter, though, just keep reminding yourself that it will all work out in the end. At least that’s what I’m (still) doing.
